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Fake Love’s 20 Warning Signs

by John Ocholi
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Today we’re going to learn about 20 signs of fake love. Now let’s begin

  1. Refusing Compromise  

All couples run into problems but the couples who love each other find ways to compromise. They’re willing to make sacrifices because they care about their partners as much as they care about themselves. So, if your partner doesn’t really love you, they may refuse to compromise. They won’t make sacrifices because they care about themselves more than they care about you  

  1. Intentional Spontaneity

Dates are one way to show your partner that you care. If you plan something your partner will see the effort you’ve invested into the relationship and that communicates love. A loveless partner makes no effort to plan dates or activities. They don’t put effort into the relationship so the responsibility falls on your shoulders. You do all the heavy lifting but a one-sided relationship isn’t loving or healthy

  1. The White Flag

When you and your partner fight what happens? Does your partner give up immediately? Do they assume every fight ends in a breakup? If you’re in love you’ll fight for the person you care about. You’d do anything for them because they are your number one. But if your partner doesn’t love you, they’ll stop fighting for you. They’ll wave their white flag anytime anything goes wrong because they’re not willing to persevere through hardship or conflict. In other words, fake partners love you when it’s easy and then they run away when it’s not  

  1. Guarding their Feelings

Does your partner keep you at arm’s length? A loving partner makes an effort to be vulnerable but a loveless partner keeps their emotions to themselves. These partners don’t want to be vulnerable because they aren’t interested in deepening your connection now. This isn’t true one hundred percent of the time though. Some partners seem closed off thanks to bad experiences in their past. These partners can and will be vulnerable with the person they love but yeah it does take time. loveless partners on the other hand keep their walls up no matter how long you’re together

  1. Creating Distance

All loving couples have one thing in common – they want to spend time together. If your partner doesn’t love you, they’ll start pulling away. You ask to spend time with them but they’re always busy. You plan a date in advance but something comes up at the last minute. So, if this sounds familiar your partner is creating distance between you. Why? well because their feelings for you may be fading

  1. Public Neglect

In public, partners should be proud of each other. A loving partner adores the person they’ve chosen so they want to show that person off to the rest of the world. Loveless partners will neglect you in public. Maybe they ditch you to hang out with their friends or even worse they may try to hide you. If your partner does either of these things it’s a sure fire sign of fake love  

  1. Emotional Discomfort

Does your partner make you uncomfortable? This is a very important sign of fake love. If you aren’t comfortable around your partner then something is definitely wrong. Your partner should be the person you feel the most comfortable with. They’re your best friend and you’re confidant they’re the person you laugh and cry with so they should make you feel confident, safe, and secure so if your partner makes you insecure, they don’t love you. Instead they’re trying to control you. Controlling partners undermine and criticize your choices. They make you feel bad about who you are because they don’t care about your happiness. They want to keep you under their thumb and that’s not love

  1. Invisible Romance

So, when was the last time your partner did something romantic? Romantic gestures show your partner that they matter to you. It keeps the spark alive by reminding them why you fell in love in the first place. Your partner doesn’t have to be the most romantic person in the world but they should show you that they care. So, if your partner doesn’t try to be romantic, they may not be in love with you

  1. Passing Blame

Will your partner admit their mistakes? will they apologize when they’re wrong? fake partners never take responsibility for their mistakes. They’ll flip every situation on you. They don’t care if you take the blame because they don’t love you nearly as much as they love themselves

  1. The Attention Deficit

Does your partner pay attention to you? loving partners give their undivided attention to their significant other. They go out of their way to show their partners that they’re present and attentive. Fake partners will pay attention to anything but you they don’t make time for you and they don’t listen to you because in their mind you’re not a priority 

  1. Subconscious Pronouns

Do you and your partner talk about the future? when they describe their future are you a part of it? this one is huge for long-term relationships. You may imagine your significant other in your future but they may not feel the same way about you. If your partner sees you in their life you can actually hear a change in the language they use. If your partners use the pronouns ‘we’ and ‘us’ they imagine a future with you in it. They love you and they’re hoping you’ll be together for a long time. On the other hand, if they use the pronouns ‘I’ and ‘me’, they don’t see you in their future. They don’t anticipate your relationship lasting and their love may not be as deep as it seems  

  1. Mutual Unhappiness

Are you happy around your partner? is your partner happy around you? mutual happiness is key to any stable relationship. You should bring out the best in each other. If you’re not doing that then you and your partner may not be in love. So just ask yourself, “am I happy with my partner? does my partner smile and laugh when we’re together?’, if the answer’s no you may be in a loveless relationship

  1.  Invasions of Privacy

Privacy is important in every relationship. Many people think couples should tell each other everything, well most of the time couples do but it’s important to maintain your individuality. No matter how much you love your partner if your partner doesn’t respect your privacy that’s a bad sign. Many insecure controlling partners will try to compromise your privacy. They’ll insist that you’re keeping secrets. They’ll look through your phone without asking and they’ll accuse you of breaking their trust. These manipulative partners are selfish and they lash out when they’re feeling insecure. So, if your partner invades your privacy, they’re not trying to love you they’re trying to control you

  1. Hiding Secrets  

While privacy is important keeping secrets can be a sign of fake love. Alright let’s say your partner actively hides their job from you or maybe they don’t tell you who their friends are or what they do on the weekends. Loving partners don’t keep these kinds of secrets. If you’re in love, you let your partner into your life. You want to share the most intimate things about you and you want to know the same things about your partner. A loveless person will hide big chunks of their life. They’ll keep secrets and they’ll protect those secrets with stories and lies. The bottom line is you need to trust your partner and if you don’t, love doesn’t stand a chance

  1. Demanding Change

As your partner asks you to change for them – when you love someone you love them for who they are, flaws and all. But fake partners will encourage you to change who you are. They don’t love you for you, they love you for the person they expect you to be and that’s not real love

  1. Unloving Language

Does your partner tell you that they love you? Loving partners find ways to express their feelings. They may not say ‘I love you’ 20 times a day but they show their affections any way they can. So, if your partner doesn’t express their affection that’s a sign of fake love. They don’t tell or show you how they feel because they don’t feel much to begin with  

  1. Petty Conflict

Does your partner disagree with you about everything? They pick fights about the tiniest most insignificant things and for the life of you, you can’t figure out why. Here’s the reason why loveless partners search for reasons to fight. They know deep down that their love isn’t real and that frustration creates unnecessary conflict  

  1. Taking Breaks

Have you and your partner ever taken a break? If your partner wants a break from you that’s a red flag. If your partner sees other people while you’re apart alarm bells should be ringing in your head. A loving partner wants to be with you. It’s that simple

  1. The Priority List 

Are you low on your partner’s priority list? When you’re in love it’s easy to prioritize your partner. You want to give them everything you can because you love them from the bottom of your heart. A loveless partner will stop making you a priority. They’ll choose their work, their friends, and their hobbies over you. They’ll make you wait and then they’ll blow you off why because they don’t actually love you  

  1. Drawing Comparisons

Does your partner compare you to other people in their life? do they threaten to find someone else if you do something wrong? this is one of the most manipulative things a partner can say. They’re forcing you to change but a loving partner would never do this. They’d never put you in such an uncomfortable position. So, don’t let anyone bully you into changing who you are. If your partner threatens to stop loving you, they never really loved you at all


credit: TopThink

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